{ .my.life. }

That morning, Wednesday 28th July, as I waited in the waiting room, with Daniel, Adele, Kim & Beth, mum summoned each of us individually to her room to have a chat with us. First cab of the rank was little Kimmy. Then me.

When I went in, she was so tired and weak, so very weak. I was probably in her room for about 20 minutes, just me and her. How lovely. She was so exhausted. So sick. Sooooo sick. I cried and sat with her and prayed while she rested. Nothing major was said, we knew we loved each other and she said she was at peace. More was said, but it will remain with me forever.

My most precious time with my mum other then that 20 minutes with her that morning, was the previous Saturday when I was with dad. Shes spoke some things that I will never forget. She was so proud of her AJ.

Two weeks previous whilst in Charters Towers I had a conversation with mum and she said the two things that she was so gutted about if she was to die were, one, not seeing her grankids growing up and two, not being at my wedding. Yep, the first night I found out about mum's cancer, that was exactly what I was so devastated about. Mum and dad have prayed so very faithfully for this Man of God to come into my world, and the thought of her missing out on not only my wedding day but my whole love story, THAT crushes me, so much.

I left the room, so sad but hoping things were going to be ok with mum.

Mum rested most of the day as we knew Kirsty, Michael, Natalie, Sam and Charlotte were arriving later that afternoon.

Check out the waiting room views! You may be able to see the GABBA?!

.samuel.natalie.charlotte.

Kirsty and all the kids had time with mum. She was exhausted.

That evening we waited, waited, and waited....

Late that evening the head of renal department came in to explain mum's cancer to us 'kids.' It went something along the lines of this....

"A spaghetti plate cancer on top of her oven bag"

Ha!

No, it was a rogue cell cancer. A very common cancer in transplant people 5-10 years after their transplant. He explained that if mum tried chemo that she would be able to have much better anti-nausea medication. We honestly knew mum wasn't going to try the chemo, but dad had spoken to mum and said that she sleep on it over night.

On the way home that night, Kim got Subway for dinner, Kirsty and I had the worst Nando's on the planet. We got back to my sister Clare's house. This was so not fun, this was actually really crap, really crap this whole situation. We all went to bed relatively early as we wanted to be at the hospital early the next morning.

Stay tuned...

Big Love

AJ Xx