It's hard to write, and put into words really it is. Like, really. The last few days since I have begun unwrapping to you lovely blog followers has been really difficult, like really painful. I am still in so much shock, sadness, despair and grief. I will never get over losing my mum, and I know it will be a daily process, because she was apart of my everyday life.
I never thought I would ever lose my mum... ever. It never entered my mind that she would never meet my husband (or who knows!?! Maybe she did?!) that she would not be at my engagement party, or my 30th, or not be there on my wedding day. That she would not be there as I dedicate my babies to God or even that she would never meet my kids, or tell me that what I was wearing looks terrible. It NEVER entered my mind, and the thought that she won't be here for those times and the ins and outs of life crushes me.
.the.silly.things.I have recieved some lovely emails, walls posts and twitter messages since my mum passed away. But there was this one that I recieved only days ago that is precious and it explained exactly of this emptiness that I've been feeling. This is what it said 'I don't believe anyone can fill the void, not even God himself, as there is a big piece of who you are that only your Mum was meant to fill.' Ahhhhhh someone gets me! There is this mum space in my heart that only my mum, Mary Patricia Tyson was ever supposed to be fill....controversial I know, but very true.
.reliable.always.there.mum.
2 comments:
Beautiful quote and so very true. Am loving your blog, now that sounds wrong because its at a time of utter sadness for you but the way you write is wonderful. Hope that makes sense. Looking forward to the next post. xo
Oh my little sis...I so understand. I too have a horrible gaping hole, and nothing anyone says makes it any better. Someone told me yesterday that 'everyone has been through this', and you know what? Maybe they have, but it doesn't lessen my grief.
I love you.
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